Being a parent is one of the most amazing and truly rewarding experiences. From early morning cuddles and coos to infectious laughter and long, sweet gazes, I wake up each day feeling so very thankful for my time spent with Lil’ Peanut. However, other feelings have also snuck up on me; feelings, I’m sure, many other mothers have experienced. I can’t quite put my finger on it, but it’s something along the lines of invisibility. Or rather fading. Yeah, it’s hard to describe.
It’s not as if my days are lacking. I wake up to a list of “to do’s” and spend most of my day perfecting the art of multi-tasking. There’s always something new with Lil’ Peanut to enjoy too, whether it be a new sound or trick, or just a dynamite diaper that found it’s way EVERYWHERE (cause for some deep appreciation for what your little one can do). It’s hard to sum up what my days entail, but they seem to be jam-packed with intention. So why is it that I feel so disconnected from things? Is this the beginning of Mommy-hood where all interesting thought, discussion, and opinions are overrun by baby babble and coupon clippings?
Being a stay-at-home mom has its challenges, and I’m obviously falling face-first into them. It’s hard to realize working friends can’t relate to the slow-paced life I live now, and I find it hard to keep up with the conversations that buzz around me. My mind is preoccupied with the minor tasks it takes to keep a household running, and the art of being in the moment seems to be evading me these days. I remember not too long ago being a girl on the move, therapy books in hand, a monthly calendar filled to the brim. Sure, I wanted life to slow down… but boy, I miss feeling like an important “someone” at the end of the day.
I guess we'll just call it a work in progress.
